Friday, April 30, 2010

good and blessed

Okay... after my last transparent post I feel like I need to share so many good things going on! :) We are encouraged and blessed right now, as well as wondering and waiting!

So many of our blessings here come from our friends. One friend of ours said that whenever he's with our family he goes away smiling. He's walking down the street smiling and people are looking at him wondering why he's smiling. Heh. :)

Another friend of mine said that before I started taking the girls to dance with her, the lobby type area where all the moms wait was always quiet and serious. Now everyone's talking and smiling. Don't know if that's all my doing... but still encouraging! :) She also said that her daughter says she thinks she should be more friendly like Jill! Ha. She said she likes how I love people and she is trying to say, "I love you" more! I guess some women in Armenia have even been told not to tell their husbands I love you too much!? hello. If you know me, you probably know that I love you! :)

Another one of my sweet, jans skyped me: " just I want to tell, the special heart that you have, it is visible, it is clear and it is shown so big. You know Jill jan I am not seeing you often but every time when i think and sms and talk with you I feel so happy." ENCOURAGING ME! And I feel the same back at her, too.

That's all encouraging to me because before we came, I'd heard someone say that when they were overseas people asked them why they were so happy and what made the difference. They could see Jesus in them. I made the comment that I'd love to have that happen to us!

I've also received a couple letters and things from the states... Proverbs 25:25 - Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land.

And we're so blessed in this day and age to have Skype and to stay in touch with family back in America! Our little Emma niece clapped to Head and Shoulders while I sang to her last week! Makes us miss her more but we're so thankful for that connection!

Homeschooling is a blessing. I love this time with my kids! Love. it. (Don't love all the papers to grade! but I love being with them and knowing more of their hearts...)

Kevin has been so blessed to work with a few good worship bands here. He was told that one group feels like they're on the edge of something big and they thanked him for being a part of that. People who probably wouldn't have been involved before are getting opportunities to be involved now. That's exciting.

Being at the orphanage is a blessing. To us and to our kids. What a great chance for them to learn and be stretched and to just plain ol' PLAY! We're loving the kids and the sisters up there. So glad we had that open door. The girl we'd thought we'd adopt... she's adorable and such a honey and we'd still be open to it if the opportunity should present itself. But really, we are glad someone wants to adopt her. I'm happy she'll be in a family and pray that they are a family who loves Jesus. She's so smart and sweet but has physical disabilities. That's tough here. Anywhere. But here things aren't set up for wheelchairs, etc... So even though we were kinda discouraged and sad, in the end we really are happy for her. Bless her, Lord.

Even though we have had just one donation to our adoption fund, I have a lovely friend, Miss Beverly, who is having her own fundraiser for our adoption. So blessed. So humbled. If you're interested in checking that out... She makes LOVELY homemade cards. http://www.etsy.com/shop/BevMom

When we opened our adoption account, I told Kevin that I feel like the Lord's saying that it might not come in little by little, but perhaps a lot at once? Maybe. But while we wait to see I want to keep my head up and on the One who knows it all. Be strong and courageous. Don't be discouraged.

Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.

It's a command! :)

So many other reasons to rejoice and celebrate! Just thought I'd throw a few out there for you to rejoice over with us! :) (Maybe it's good for me just to type up a few good things for my own benefit!) God is stretching us and drawing us into a deeper relationship with Him and we want that more than we want our own desires. We're still following Him close and excited to see what He has next.

Lijah's enjoying reading

This book starts out "Jill is a pig." heehee... Then she sits in the mud. Then at the end she has tea with Lil and it says that they will get fat... heeheehee... He loves it. So funny! :) Fat. We don't usually say that someone's fat so it's extra funny... (Had to tease Daddy, too, while we were all laughing... our boy...)



The other day, he stood in front of the bookshelf next to Kevin and said, "Hum, what should I read?" tapping his chin... so sweet. He's ready to take on the Narnia books already!!

Monday, April 26, 2010

transparent, random thoughts

okay, so this has kind of been a deflating week. miscommunications on the field, financial stuff, missing our baby girl niece who's growing without us, finding out the girl we'd thought we might adopt just had another family "pick" her, getting only one donation to our adoption fund... just imagine a balloon slowly deflating... heh. where are we? why? what are Your plans and purposes? what's next? what's now? I guess in the middle of the questions is where faith grows the most? all we can do is trust Him and His good work in our lives. ~be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer.~ build us, grow us, make us strong. be our Hope.

at the end of his sermon on sunday, the pastor reminded us:
-God is good.
-God loves you.
-God knows your need.

good to hear the basics all over again sometimes.

sometimes I find myself thinking: I hope someone's praying for us, then I am reminded... someone else is probably thinking that same thing right now. who needs me to pray for them now? Holy Spirit, show me who needs my prayers. that would be a much more productive, powerful thing for me to do, huh?

fix your eyes on Jesus.
set your hearts at rest in His presence.
God has good plans.
wait. and see.
enjoy now.

we feel like we've obeyed. we've tried to do what God's put on our hearts and set before us. time. timing. I read this week that just like His eye is on the sparrow, it's also on the wrist watch... He's got time under control, too. after we've done all we know to do, we just have to perch on the edge and wait for the "go". wait for the "see". in the meantime... He says know Me. know Jesus better.

I swing between totally trusting and being completely impatient. *dislike* steady me, Lord. let me find satisfaction in You. joy in now. peace in your presence. thank You that You are our Rock. You are patient with me. thank You for Your good plans.

I'm doing Beth Moore's Esther study now... good for this time. destiny. I listened to her talk about how hard it is for a little girl to be an orphan and have no mama or papa... cried... now today her session 3 talk is about time and unfolding destiny/perfect timing - Esther 4:14 ...who knows? maybe you're here for such a time as this... who knows? God knows.

God knows. All powerful, all seeing, all knowing.
God knows.
One step at a time.
Who knows... turns into "I Know."

Empower us to do the impossible for Your glory.
(even if the impossible seems to be -wait and see!)

Monday, April 19, 2010


Mt Ararat from behind our house... siroon a.

Happy Easter! :)

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Benjamin is 11!

So we are inching closer and closer to having a teenager in the house! :) He's pretty pleased. When he turned 9 years old, he informed me that he was halfway there... on his way to college! Hello!! Enjoy being the little guy for a while anyway!

We're proud of Benjamin. So smart and studious. He loves to learn and study. He loves what's right and good. He's been a great big brother since forever. He's brave to try new things but not the crazy in-you-face American! Heh. He's a good basketball player. And still has a great imagination. He loves to read and to write. He's got a great journal that he started for school last year and then just kept up after the year ended. That'll be fun to read as the years go by. He's got a tender heart and a great smile. Love that kid.

This year, we're trying to get him to that observatory! I guess there's one here in Armenia and we were going to go last year but it never happened! So we better get up there this year, huh? He still is loving space and oceans. Little things in big places?! :) We've had a bit of a doughnut party for him this year. Went to Yum Yum on his birthday and also picked up some doughnuts there to share with our friends at the office the next week. We spent some time at our favorite park playing football and of course made his favorite meal for supper, bowtie noodles... noodles with cream of mushroom sauce and chicken. (used up our last cans of the sauce to celebrate him!!) :) Oh, and we made some brownies, too! And got cookies from Olivia. Yum... sweet celebrations, huh?!

Good day. Good kid. Good God. Good plans. Good life.

Monday, April 12, 2010

the voice

God uses my kids to talk to me. The other day Elijah wanted to take apart our little wooden chair to see if his big volleyball would fit through the back of it! (There's a space between the back and the seat but not one that's big enough for a big ball to fit through...) Our conversation went like this:

E: Help me take these cushions off!!
M: Lijah, it won't fit!
E: Help me take these cushions off!!
M: Lijah! Trust me!
E: Take them off; I want to see!
M: Liajh. Trust me.
E: Show me!
M: Trust me.
E: Show me!
M: Trust...

You get how the rest of the story went. As we went back and forth, I caught the unmistakable "voice" of the Lord... Um, hum. Trust Me. But I wanna see-show me... Trust Me.

So that moment in time was followed by me remembering that I needed to drip Ruth's ear with medicine to clear up her second ear infection:

M: Ruth?! Let me drip your ear.
R: Ah, wah, mooooom! ahhhhh...
M: I'm trying to help you! Lay down.
(are you hearing the "voice" already...)
R: Maaaammmm, I want to play. I don't want to lay down!
M: Ruth. I'm doing this to help you. Lay down, baby.
R: Wahhhhhhh... ~angry eyebrows and pouty lips~

Ruth is always running and hardly ever stopping. Telling her to lay down and "be still" three times a day is torture! But you and I both know why it has to be done. It is for her own good. It will make things better. Um, hum... being still is for your own good.

Give me ears to hear and faith to trust...

(~You can see that Ruth's lost her first two teeth in the past couple weeks!! One on the top and one on the bottom. The other top one is loose and should come out pretty soon, too! Cutie pa-tootie!)

checking, waiting, trusting...

So. Checking the adoption fund does not make it fill up any faster. Lesson I learned this week! Heh. I've decided that for all the checking I do... I will stop and pray about it instead of checking on it! Much more productive. And much more energizing. God has good plans.

On the upside, we have some money in our adoption fund now! Whoo! But sooo much more to go. I know God is going to teach us some amazing things as we trust and obey Him. Build our faith, Lord. You are able. Nothing is impossible with you. You say, open wide your mouth and I will fill it... we are open and waiting to see Your work fulfilled.

I've been reading about George Mueller a little bit this week. Interesting guy. You know a little bit about a guy and when you read more, the little bit you knew is even more interesting. If you don't know his story, (watch VeggieTales! :) and let me fill you in a little... he trusted God for everything and built up several orphanages through prayer. People say he never asked anyone for anything but still the money came in just when it was needed. He prayed for everything and trusted that God would answer. Cool. So it inspires us... and makes us think. Well, then. Do we not tell anyone our need and just pray? I love to know God hears and answers prayers. I believe He is as mighty and wonderful now as He's always been. So. Do we keep our plans to ourselves and just pray? Well, I kinda thought, we're the body of Christ. We should talk to each other, too, right? Then today I read an interesting quote from Mueller:

It is not enough to obtain means for the work of God, but that these means should be obtained in God's way. To ask unbelievers for means is not God's way; to press even believers to give, is not God's way; but the duty and the privilege of being allowed to contribute to the work of God should be pointed out, and this should be followed up with earnest prayer, believing prayer, and will result in the desired end.

So he confirmed what I had been thinking... that it should be looked upon as a "privilege to contribute to the work of God." As the body of Christ, we should like giving to the work of God. (So we weren't completely faith-less to share our excitement if it's looked at in that light, right?) And of course, what we all know about Mueller... Pray, baby, pray! Watch and see what God will do!

I've also been reading verses about being still and waiting... put your hope in God... Oh, man. Why is waiting so stinkin' hard? I think I'd rather be told I had to run across the country instead of... wait! I know God's number one thing for our lives is to know Him and that this is one big way that we get to know Him. So I understand. And I want to know Him more! But ugh. Waiting.

Then, to my relief, I read another verse about not being still.

Psalm 83:1
O God, do not keep silent;
be not quiet, O God, be not still.

So I decided that as long as I can pray, Lord, don't be quiet. Don't be still! Be big, mighty, loud, crazy - Act! Then I can deal with my own verses telling me "be still." I can rest a little easier knowing that He is not still. He is working!

We will still check the adoption fund. But we will continue to try to keep our focus on the One who has it all under control!